confuzzled ?

I miss you. I think ? Not like things are any different. Just the status. I'll admit I did fall too fast. Never usually happens..Wait it has happend before, but not usually. I still have that unsatisfied feeling that there is still things I want to say, its just i don't know what it is. I don't want you to feel bad because i don't really care. This is something I most definitely shouldn't be worrying about. Don't baby me because I can take care of myself. Maybe I'm mad ? I know I'm past sad though. I was used to not talking to you. Only seeing you once a week or even less. I'm glad i had my close friends and family by my side to help me realize what I was doing wrong. Haaa & If it wasn't for them, I probably wouldn't be feeling this way right now. Maybe we would have still been "talking" but in a wrong way. I would taking every wrong turn and turn every problem into an excuse; like waiting patiently until you realized I was still there behind you the whole time, waiting to see if you really noticed that I was going to be there for you always. but I don't think you did until i finally told you how much it sucked to be just a girl on the side. I hate catching the feelings too fast. I wanted something to come out of this relationship. Or maybe something will come out. Just not yet. I hate how I say I can do things, but when it gets to the point I totally freak out and never do what was intended. Like totally wanting a friendship before a relationship ? Yeah never worked out. I'm still waiting for someone like that to come by. Maybe there is someone under my nose. I just feel like crap. I really want us to be still be FRIENDS,like we agreed on; but I honestly don't know what that is between me and you because we never experienced it. We skipped that big step and went into the loveyduvey junk. Not good not good not good because "true love waits." Just want you to know I'll always be here for you, and I miss you.. Ahh frick, i hate hiding my feelings, it sucks.